Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Frustration leads to Loathing

While we all long for that "dream job", and BLESS those of you who've found it, I am finding myself in tears right now. My dream job seems so simple, but is soooo far out of my reach.

After the ridiculous issues we've gone through with sitters/daycare for Camilla, I wanted to be able to stay home with her. I thought, "WOW, I'll get a job sitting a child here at the house and that will be that!" Here's where it's strange to desperate as we were for a sitter (and I was BEGGING everywhere), I couldn't find a sitter to save my life! Now I'm looking for a child to watch, and there are NONE of those to be had either!

This is WHY it blows my mind; I'm very health-conscious, educated, LOVE being outdoors, LOVE activities, and I LOVE teaching and helping little ones explore the world! WHO wouldn't want a sitter like that? We did, NOT what we got in the past! Now we're having issues with the daycare; Camilla is coming home RAW red every day with diaper rash. It goes away while she's at home, and as soon as she goes back to school, it comes back. :(  THIS is ridiculous!

I have been busting my ass applying for online writing jobs, but because I've only published 3 poems in my time, I'm a joke!?! Because my blog isn't a blog that talks specifically about ONE topic, it doesn't qualify for ANYTHING. If I started a whole NEW blog with one topic, I'd have to buy another domain name, and then wait for at least 6 months before it will qualify for reviews? DAMMIT, I give up.

I would wash peoples' dirty clothes if it meant getting to stay at home with Loli and make sure she's safe and taken care of....I don't want to stay at home and sit on my ass; I still want to work. It's STUPID, and I am so frustrated that it's making me sick! I cannot find a 2nd shift job, because people look at my current income/experience and think I'm OVER-qualified for anything that I'm applying. I am just stuck and it's pissing me off.....

*climbs off soapbox to go cry in the corner*


Anonymous said...

You would make a great nanny, too bad there are no kids nearby in need of one.